It's safe to say that the split of their parents wasn't on the best of terms. All in all, I've been in their lives since they were 4 and 8. I've seen them grow, helped them with homework, tried to guide their character development from a weird place. They've both confided in me in times of struggle and triumph. I've at times been their kick in the butt when needed. But I am NOT their mom or their dad...and I'm cool with that.
I don't seek to replace either parent, nor do I think I ever should, but I do have a place. I coach for a living so I have a unique look into the sometimes crazy motivations of parents who truly believe that their children are possessions or at least living, breathing monuments to their own greatness. I feel strongly that children come to this world through their parents, not FOR their parents.
So I will never claim them as my own, and I don't feel that I should. I'm cool to be the anonymous onlooker in the stands. Oh I'll brag about them and share moments from our time together, you better believe it. You will just NEVER see me claim them as my children. I won't burden them with my need to feel validated in their lives. I know where I stand from our many private moments together. They have a mom and a dad who loves them. I'm good to just be a bonus and a resource for them. Their emotional needs far outweigh my own.
.... AND I'm cool with that.
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